Some things we can hold to our shame, or we can allow it to bring glory to Yah(God):
Many years ago (approx. 13), I helped to commit murder.
About 5 years ago, I was sitting in my living room, and I began to cry, uncontrollably for sometime. This went on for about a week. In my anguish, I cried out to Abba, “Why do I feel as if I am mourning?” “Why am I weeping so?”
He spoke so clearly to me on that day, and said “You are mourning for the baby you helped to murder”.
I knew instantly what He was speaking of.
When I was Active Duty Air Force and stationed in Italy, I had a friend notify me that she was going to be stationed there. We had become close friends from my first base in Alaska, however had not spoken too much after we both left. Shortly after arriving in Italy, she confessed to me that she was 3 or 4 months pregnant from her previous base, and that she could not throw away everything to raise a child and be a mother. She wanted to have an abortion.
I agreed to help her. I took time off work, I remember the somber day that I drove her to the hospital, dropped her off, and went about my day, as if nothing was wrong. I picked her up a few hours later, and my friend was never the same.
When I walked into that hospital room, a looming eeriness crept around me, her face was pale, not from the procedure, but the after effect of knowing what had just happened. She looked as if a part of her had died; and, to my ignorance at that time, I could not fully understand why.
Days went by, years went by, changing bases went by, and then I became pregnant with Tony and I’s first child, Alissa. I eagerly went through each week of development, and remember the first appointment, as just 4 weeks, the sound of a heartbeat, so strong, and sign of life. We both wept at that wonderful sound. I remember the flutter of the first kick, her letting me know she was alive and well, and growing.
Soon after I had Alissa, I became pregnant with Danielle. I knew what it was like to have life abundantly growing within me, and the awe of creation, so neatly woven within me, through the hand of our Creator. Two beautiful girls, now ages 7 and 8.
Psalm 139:13For You formed my inmost being; You knit me together in my mother’s womb. (BSB)
Remembering back to those somber days, 5 years ago, I wept for that child that I helped my friend to murder, and I repented of what I had done. It was godly sorrow that led me to mourn, to weep, and to confess to her that I was guilty. I was an accomplice, and I asked for her forgiveness, for not being the friend I should have been, in standing up for her and her unborn child.
So, when I speak up against abortion, and the murder of the innocent, I am coming from a place that has experienced such; while never doing so to my own children, it is the same in the eyes of Yah. I was guilty of murder.
Proverbs 6:16These six things doth the LORD hate: yea, seven are an abomination unto him: 17A proud look, a lying tongue, and hands that shed innocent blood, (KJV)
Yah, hates the shed of innocent blood; and it does not matter if you are the one actually doing the murder/abortion. If you are involved, in agreement, or allowing others to make these choices, without speaking up, you will be held accountable.
The reconciliation, did not go well with my friend, she had so much guilt and pain, and remorse for what had happened that she would not forgive herself, or allow God to forgive her, let alone her forgiving me. I still pray for her.
I saw firsthand the utter disastrous effects that abortion has on a woman, and the years of torment from guilt and pain. What I witnessed in that hospital when I saw my friend’s face, will forever be embedded in my memory. It was a moment that I saw, reflected from within her, the realization that the life of her child, was gone.
I weep now, for her, and for all the others that have been so utterly deceived to believe this lie of ‘pro-choice’, or the lie, that you have to continue on in shame and/or unforgiveness.
Abortion is wrong, and it is murder, and it is sin. However, there is hope, healing and forgiveness through Messiah Yeshua.
♦1 John 1:9If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness (KJV)
♦Isaiah 43:25I, yes I, am He who blots out your transgressions for My own sake and remembers your sins no more.
In closing, I wanted to bring attention to the cover photo of this post. It is a picture of a sculpture that was done by a man named Martin Hudáček of Slovakia, and is called “Memorial for Unborn Children”. Martin was moved to create a sculpture to draw attention to the devastation abortion can bring to women, and to the fact that through the love and mercy of God, reconciliation and healing is made possible.
The sculpture shows a figure of a woman in great sorrow, grieving her abortion. The second figure in the work is the aborted child, presented as a young child, who in a very touching, healing way, comes to the mother, to offer forgiveness.
Martin, said the sculpture also “expresses hope which is given to believers by the One who died on the cross for us, and showed how much He cares about all of us.”’
Yeshua/Jesus came to set the captives free, and you can be free, and lay all your heavy burdens on Him. May all those who have been affected by abortion, be healed in the mighty name of Yeshua/Jesus!
Matthew 11:28 Come to Me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.
